No quiero
Wednesday, July 8 2009
Another translation from Ramon San Pedro:
I do not want
I do not want to look for refuge in poetry
nor in fantasy start to fly
nor travel in the perfume of a single rose
nor journey in my boat through your seas
I want to be so crude, singular, and crazy
as you please in your nonsense – “chance” or “destiny”.
It is all this repugnant monstrosity
by which the hypocrites would wash your awareness of me.
My brothers do their good deeds,
giving like that, unleashing compassion.
This is my role, keeping the world
in apparent order. There will always be someone
who is happy not to be in my place.
I want to fall even lower, much lower still,
so far into the humiliation of my person
till I am so pathetic, inhuman, and fetid
that from compassion or reason they decide to liberate me.
The fools will say “kill”, of course.
I am above their cruelty!
(Cartes desde el infierno, p 147)
This one has some tough bits, so I’m not even 70% sure of the translation. It doesn’t help that I haven’t done this in a while, and meanwhile I’m steadily forgetting my Spanish. Still, I’m pretty sure I have the gist – and it’s a striking, powerful poem.
